As some of you already know I took a week off to come up North to get away from all distractions and focus on my Brighton Fringe show, Made in Cumbria. As the name goes, it is the perfect place to get my inspiration and knuckle the hell down. Also, love any excuse to wear my walking boots!
I arrived last Thursday and we have had some surprisingly hot days. I got sunburnt on Saturday and what I like to think of as, 'a base tan' on Sunday and Tuesday. Dare I say, it's almost been tropical. I've been so lucky to have great weather and to catch up with family, plus my friends. Had lovely breakfast and a walk in Ulverston on Saturday with my cousins. I have even visited the local Buddhist Centre at Conishead Priory twice. Twice for tea and cake. Some mindfulness, but mostly for the cake. And the views. The views are lovely. So is the cake.
On Sunday, I persuaded my Dad to film me on the moors as the that was the only day that was looking to be a hot one. We grabbed my stuff, minimal costume, my Dad's old camera and snacks then headed for the hills. Literally.
I had intended to write out scripts to film and plan it all out. I have loved having total control over putting my show together. I have found that the only person I can really trust with this project is myself. This makes me just get on, get organised and do it! However, with the videos what actually happened is we improvised most, well, all the scenes. I felt a bit embarrassed at first being my characters in front of my Dad. I kind of wonder if my parents think that their 33 year old daughter should be doing something more serious and lucrative like banking...no, they would actaully hate that. Although, I would be able to get a good deal on a mortgage. I digress. So, it turns out my parents are totally supportive of my comedy and love being involved. I actually already know this.
Proof: Mum made Kirsty a name badge!
On the moors on Sunday, Dad led the interviews with the camera while filming me. There were actually a few times we had to pause the filming as my Dad was laughing so much and shaking the camera. I have edited those bits out. Funny though.
It meant a lot to me to film up on the moors as that is where I spent most of my childhood with my Grandad. I mention about this in my stand up set. We would go for long walks and talk about everything. I think my Grandad is definitely one of the people I got my sense of humour from. We filmed by the beck by the little bridge that as a child I paddled in and threw stones into. I could have stayed up there all day as it was so peaceful. We actually stayed up there for about four hours which was great. Hence, sunburn. We did see three birds of prey which was also a bonus! And, sheep. Lots of sheep.
We filmed Karroll Kavannagh, Cumbria's leading survival expert and Kirsty Bird, Head Falconer. We then filmed a couple of other characters back at my house.
(The shot above totally happened. I mean literally totes happened)
I managed to edit about 15 short videos in a couple of days. Then something weird happened to me, I started to get shy about sharing the videos. I started with those insecure thoughts like, 'Are people going to think I'm weird? Are they going to find this funny? Am I good enough?' Blah, blah, blah. That annoying inner voice that can make you doubt everything good you believe in and care about doing. I have been trying to ignore this voice and put my work out there. As a friend said, 'People already know you're weird'. Thanks Rob, that is actually true.
I am still a bit scared of putting my videos out there. They are to promote the characters, introduce them and promote my show. I think I am so cut off from my comedy people while I am up here that I forget other people put videos of themselves up all the time! Why am I so worried? I know I am worried in case I am not good enough. That old core belief that rears it's ugly head. To get over this, I have been asking friends and other comedians if they feel the same way sometimes. They do. Phew. I wanted this blog diary to be honest and I think this, 'am I good enough?' feeling will remain in the corner of my mind until I know 100% the show is the best it can be. I wonder if dentists ever wonder if they are good enough?
I have actually made Karroll a mini vlog series. In one video Karroll talks about Ray Mears and then last night I dreamt Ray Mears came to my house to complain. I think I'm letting my work get to me too much!!
So, with a deep breath....I give you an introduction to Kirsty Bird and Karroll Kavannagh. (Make sure you play with the highest HD settings to get better quality)
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